Have we gone backwards?

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/more-news/ready-or-not-mothers-on-call/story-fn7x8me2-1226291335446

Above is a news article I read about a woman by the name of Gina Ford, who has written a book, which says that women should have sex as soon as possible with their husbands/partners after they give birth, because the husbands feel left out!!

Hello???  Have we honestly gone back in time, have all the women's rights movements been forgotten in one foul swoop.  Has this woman even had a child?

I have had three children, and believe me when I say, you don't feel much like having sex after you give birth. 

*Sorry to any male readers, it's about to get gross*

I can't speak for cesarean patients as I only had vaginal births, but let me tell you just how that feels.

First, your vagina stretches to four times it's normal size, if you are lucky you wont tear, but more often than not, you have a tear on the area between the vagina and anus.  Which stings every time you go to the toilet.  Your stomach muscles hurt worse than any exercise like sit ups could provide, you have all of your 9 months of periods at once, your hormones are bouncing around, one minute your laughing the next your crying, your boobs are so sore, that the slightest touch feels like your about to have a heart attack.  Your legs ache from your hips down to your calfs, and when it comes to that time to do your first poo, you just would rather have someone reach in and pull it out rather than sitting there having to push again.

You have doctors and nurses constantly prodding and poking at you, checking your tears if you have any.  If your lucky and didn't need stitches, you just have an incredibly stingy cut, but if you do need stitches, the checking becomes even more, not to mention the needle they have to stick in there, to numb it first.

Then of course, there is the 3 hour feeding, and the nurses in between who come and check your blood pressure and pulse, and check on baby.  Then there is that dreaded first night home, where the baby does nothing but cry all night, and you spend the night awake, nursing and cradling, or like me laying there with bubby on my stomach.  You panic at every noise, you sleep with one ear open, listening to make sure your baby is still breathing, you still can't really get comfortable in bed, because your body aches, you have to get up and change the sanitary pad every hour, because the blood is so heavy that it just can't be ignored.  You don't have time to have a shower because all you want to do is sleep, you look at your house work and begin to cry because you know you need to vacuum but baby wants a feed once more.

As well as all of this, you have to entertain the endless stream of visitors, you have to put on a brave face and tell them how much your loving motherhood, where in actual fact all your thinking is, I just want sleep.  And then the minute you close your eyes, your baby thinks now is the time to play, and wants company. Oh and of course there is the endless supply of nappy changes, clothes changes (both you and baby due to that lovely white vomit that they leave everywhere) and bathing.

So after all this do you honestly think women would want sex?

Don't get me wrong, it calms down, and mum's we get in the rhythm of things, but books like what Gina Ford have written is ridiculous.  Her reasoning is that men feel neglected and need intimacy, but you know what, intimacy doesn't have to involve sex!

Intimacy can simply be laying in bed, cuddling, talking about how each partner is doing.  It can be that he holds her hand while she feeds, to some women (me included) intimacy is hubby picking up the vacuum cleaner and helping me out while I do yet another nappy change.  My husband calls housework foreplay... but maybe we have just been married for so long ha ha.

But guys if you are feeling like you are left out, then do something about it, actually talk to your wife, sit and give her a cuddle, turn the television off and rub her feet.  Ask her if she needs some help, could you take over and feed baby.  I can guarantee as you fill her love tank up and help her and take some of the pressure away, she will be more inclined when she is physically able to give you a jolly good shagging!!

Love you all

Sam
xxx

Animal Ethics

As some of you may or may not know, I'm studying my Bachelor of Psychology at Uni.  I started this week.  One of the subjects that I have chosen to do as an elective is Behavioural Neuroscience.  I really like the idea of this, study what makes up the brain, how the brain works, and how through the brain our behaviour stems.

This cat is being given a bionic ear, to help the deaf here again.

However, what I naiively didn't realise is that part of being a Behavioural Neuroscientist, you do testing on animals.  They will test certain behaviours etc.  One of the tests that the University is doing at the moment is with rats, they have reduced the amount of calories by 25% that they are feeding them, to see whether this reduces the amount of anxiety.  The scientists also attempted this experiement with people but because they can't completely control what a person eats and does, the experiement results varied far too much, so have found it works better in rats.

Yesterday during my lecture, we were told all about animal ethics and when it is right to do animal testing and when it is inappropriate.  For example did you know, that scientists cannot in a lab work out how much is a lethal dose of botox? So this means every single batch of botox is tested on some sort of animal to see what is a lethal dose.  This just confirmed to me that I will NEVER have botox.  I wont let an animal die for my vanity.

But here is my dilemma, if the animal testing was done to save humanities life is it ok?  They tested chemotherapy on animals, insulin, organ donation, vaccines and medications.  Is this ok? I don't know.  I'm really stuck on how I feel about the whole thing.

I heard a story yesterday that we can now give our pet cats kidney transplants.  What happens is, the owner would adopt a cat from a shelter and they transplant a healthy kidney from that cat, to the pet cat who needs it.  Then the family must keep both cats.  Is this right? I mean they are saving a cat that would probably have been put to sleep anyway.  This way it has a great chance of life, just with one less kidney.  So techniqually you have saved two cats.

I know that groups like PETA hate any sort of animal cruelty, in fact that would say we shouldn't even own pets at all.  That we should let all animals be wild.  That we shouldn't eat meat, farm or any of that.  That there should be no domestic animals at all.

However, welfare groups such as RSPCA are accepting of animal testing for medical purposes.  They oppose testing of beauty products etc. But for medical purposes such as putting electrodes in an animals brain and watching it they are ok with.

So what do you think?

One of the things that was said in the lecture yesterday, is at the university of Latrobe at least, before they can do any animal testing, they have a group that meets, this group is made up of various people, one is a vet who doesn't work for the university who will listen to what the scientists want to do before they say whether this will be visable for the animal.  One is an animal welfare person, so they might be from RSPCA or another such welfare group, who will agree or disagree depending on whether this is not considered cruelty.  There will be lawyers, there will be the scientists, there will be a person who is in charge of taking care of the animals care normally and some other people.  Before they do any form of testing they all sit together and have a meeting.  They discuss whether it is possible to replace, reduce or refine.  This means they can replace the animals with other form of lab testing either using cells, or artifical materials.  They can reduce the number of animals they will need to use or they can refine the experiment to being the best technique that is available.  And of course there are rules of which they must adhere to, there is the Prevention to cruelty to Animals act of 1986, there is the Australian code of practice as well as for the University at least, the uni's rules.

I heard an alarming fact yesterday which said that in the US, of all the population 19% have a mental illness.  In order to help understand and medicate efficiently scientists believe the best way to do it is by testing on animals.  Do you agree?

What would your solution be? How could scientists get around using animals? Are there better test subjects?

I just don't know.

Well I will leave you with a few facts.


Studies of animals account for only 7 to 8% of all published research in Psychology
93% of all research animals were lab reared rats.
In Victoria 22 Macaques, 3 Baboons and 4 marmasets made up the other 7%

So what do you think?

Love you all

Sam
xxx